Teen Fashion: The Good, The Bad and The Baffling

Today’s post is devoted to teenage three headline-grabbers, each crying out for an Annabel Manners Taste Makeover®. 
 
First we have celebrity sister Noah Cyrus, poor lamb, who showed up to Kylie Jenner’s birthday party looking like a teen runaway. There’s SO much to worry about here, but for some reason her hair and makeup bother me most of all. Did she learn those tricks from YouTube tutorials, or did an adult professional do this to her 15-year-old face? 

Unfortunately, Noah’s tacky descent was forecasted long ago on this very blog, based not on questionable relatives but on the wildly inappropriate Halloween costume she wore to a party at the tender age of nine. I’m sorry to tell you a pair of tiny motorcycle boots completed this look. 

Our next outfit is less likely to make you call Child Protective Services, but mystifying nonetheless. 


 
I’ve never bought into the whole Hailee-Steinfeld-As-Fashion-Darling thing. She’s not exactly Tavi Gevinson, or even a Fanning sister, for that matter. That said, maybe Talita Von Furstenberg could take Hailee under her wing — socialites do love charity work, after all — and teach her how to be effortlessly chic.
 
Finally, I give you Ariana Grande, who is technically not a teen. But clearly she’s bound for rehab because how else do you explain wearing this ridiculous thing to the airport? Adult onesies were featured on Annabel Manners back in 2011, so they’re not even au courant. 

 
[Editor’s Note: You’re probably thinking enormous pajamas are the least of Ariana’s etiquette concerns, what with that whole donut-licking scandal. You’re certainly not wrong.]
 
On the bright side, last night’s Teen Choice Awards brought out a slew of rising starlets, most of whom looked perfectly cute. Come to think of it, the only major fashion misstep came from sweetly tragic Britney Spears, whose ruffled hemline, aggressive cleavage and dip-dyed hair made for a very desperate look. 
 
Let’s wrap up on a positive note, shall we? Town & Country magazine recently designated 50 Modern Swans, and they are simply divine! These enchanting young women are reassuring proof that gracious girls still walk the earth (and thus our sons are not doomed to marry trollops).

Have a glamorous week, everybody!
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