Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome AnnabelManners.com alumna Jessica Simpson, shown here in a sweater the size of Canada and no pants. If you believe the gossip sites, she chose this getup for a recent family photo shoot.
- Wrestle her to the ground
- Forcibly remove said sweater
- Teach her about the perils of over-sized clothing on short people
- Purge her closet of mom jeans, tight dresses, and any other ill-advised knits
My pick? Celebrity stylist Britt Bardo, who:
- Has worked with Jennifer Lopez (therefore understands curves)
- Grew up in the Midwest (thus will relate to Simpson’s down-home roots)
- Now resides in Los Angeles (and can be at Chez Simpson in 20 minutes)
Jessica, honey, I know blind dates can be daunting, but give Britt a chance.
I predict you’ll have a long, happy relationship and wonder why you didn’t meet years ago!