Oh, Taylor Swift. Two things.
1. You are beyond cute but you MUST ease up on the eye makeup. Immediately.
Instead, follow fellow Tennesean Reese Witherspoon’s sterling example of how to conduct yourself after a breakup. It’s easy!
- Save the disparaging remarks for your girlfriends
- Pick the perfect moment to unveil a spectacular new look
- Start dating someone cooler, hotter, and more successful
You might even consider wearing a bracelet that says WWRD. (What Would Reese Do?)
Need more help? Just drop me an email, darlin’. I’ll turn you into the Grace Kelly of country music. Cross my heart!